Tuesday 3 December 2019

Central Asia - what I learned

My summer visit to Central Asia came about because various family commitments led to my cancelling a South American trip, and choosing a location in a bit of a hurry once I could get away. So I was less prepared than usual, though with a few ideas. But I learned a lot over my travels.


  • First off, Central Asia is massive. Kazakhstan could be a continent all on its own. Distances are immense, trains and buses are slow, roads are not great. It's easy to spend an entire day on a bus just to get from one place in Kyrgyzstan to another. And half the time, there are no buses, and you'll spend three days working out how to get from where you are to where you want to be. Next time, I'll take a motorbike.
  • The distances mean it's best to be ruthless about focusing on where you want to go. I know I missed some interesting trips. But given my time again, I would spend more time in southern Kazakhstan, and a lot more time at Song Kul, and I wouldn't, probably, bother with Issyk Kul (a heresy would upset many of my Kyrgyz friends).
  • Secondly, while Uzbekistan has Disneyfied many of its major sites, you can still get off the beaten track to places like Chor Bakr, near Bukhara, where pilgrims enjoy feeding the tame pigeons, or the quiet Bahauddin Naqshband mausoleum with its engaging signboards carrying quotes from the Sufi in Persian, Uzbek and English. I was surprised just how few travellers even manage to cross the road from the Registan in Samarkand, but there are some beautiful small mosques off the main drag.
  • People are wonderful. Uzbek grandmas made me dance. Kazakh families took me off on a pilgrimage that involved jumping naked into a freezing river, put me up overnight, and made me drink tea with jam in it (for which the British Tea God punished me with indigestion). On any local bus you will find a grandma, a student, or a local elder who will take care of you, even if you don't share a single language between you. Whenever I was in trouble, I could find someone who would help. All I had to do was look lost, start to cry, or kick something.
  • The food is dreadful. I had roadkill shashlik in Khiva - fifteen separate shards of bone in a single mouthful of chicken. I know, because I counted them as I spat them out. Take a good knife and you can buy succulent melons; get figs, apples and plums from the markets; but don't count on restaurant food to make your life worth living.
  • On the other hand, the green tea is always good. 
  • Vegetarians, note that according to most cooks in central Asia, sausage is a vegetable.
  • Then I found ashlanfu. Two kinds of noodles, plenty of chili, plenty of vinegar, 30 cents a dish. If only the eastern Kyrgyz could convert everyone else in central Asia to eat ashlanfu, I'd be happy.
  • Language. Russian is invaluable. There will always be someone who speaks Russian. Younger people often speak English.
  • Mastercard. Don't take it. For some reason this is a Visa zone.
I learned some non-practical things, too. For instance, how Islam here is blended with the animistic and shamanic beliefs that were here before. Kazakh pilgrimages involve squeezing yourself through tiny holes in the rock, climbing up rocks using footholds slippery with age and the feet of thousands of pilgrims, jumping into rivers, drinking from sacred fountains. Sacred sites in Uzbekistan have notices forbidding worshippers from making sacrifices, which is a bit of a giveaway that it's something that people needed to be told not to do. At Shahrisabz, I saw pilgrims in one shrine pouring water on to a tombstone; when it collected in the hollow at the end of the stone, they scooped it up in tea bowls and drank it, and put what remained after everyone had drunk in a thermos flask to take it away.

I learned that Kyrygz chocolate is amazing, and Kazakh chocolate is cheaper but comes with sour cherries in it. I loved both. 

I learned that the downside of staying with nomads is that every time you step outside the tent, your boots will get covered in animal shit. Again.

I learned that Almaty has Costa Coffee and Marks & Spencers and Mercedes showrooms, but it was bloody hard to find an ATM. I learned that Almaty is full of Indian medical students, because it's where you go to study if you can't afford the US or UK. 

And I learned that there is an old man in the Samani Park in Bukhara who will sing to you, and kiss your hand when you go, if you chat to him (and are female: men get a handshake or a hug).

No comments:

Post a Comment